"Pada Seva means to serve the lotus feet of Guru and Krishna.You cannot serve Krishna without Guru, or serve just Guru without serving Krishna. They must be served or offered pada seva simultaneously." - Srila Prabhupada

  • "A highly advanced Vaisnava lives in such a way that no one can understand what he is or what he was." (Srimad-Bhagavatam, 7.3.14, Purport)
  • "... there is nothing as profitable as the association of pure devotees." (Teachings of Lord Caitanya, Page 341)
  • "By the mercy of the spiritual master one receives the benediction of Krsna. Without the grace of the spiritual master, one cannot make any advancement." (Sri Sri Gurv-astaka, Verse 8)
  • "A pure devotee cannot forget the Supreme Lord for a moment, and similarly, the Supreme Lord cannot forget His pure devotee for a moment." (Bhagavad-gita As It Is, 8.15, Purport)
  • "The Spiritual Master is present wherever his sincere disciple is trying to serve his instructions. " (Srila Prabhupada letter, 12/01/73)
  • "I was born in the darkest ignorance, and my spiritual master opened my eyes with the torchlight of knowledge. I offer my respectful obeisances unto him." (Sri Guru Pranama)
  • "My dear Partha, one who claims to be My devotee is not so. Only a person who claims to be the devotee of My devotee is actually My devotee." (Lord Krsna, Adi Purana)
  • "Pure devotees of the Lord are more powerful than the waters of the sacred river Ganges. One can derive spiritual benefit out of prolonged use of the Ganges waters. But one can be sanctified at once by the mercy of a pure devotee of the Lord." (Srimad-Bhagavatam, 1.1.15, Purport)
  • "No one can approach the Supreme Personality of Godhead directly. One must approach Him through His pure devotees." (Nectar of Devotion, Chapter 12)
  • "Real knowledge can be obtained from a person who is in perfect Krsna consciousness. Therefore, one has to seek out such a bona fide spiritual master and, under him, learn what Krsna consciousness is. The spiritual master can drive away all nescience, as the sun drives away darkness." (Bhagavad-gita As It Is, 5.16, Purport)
Showing posts with label parenting advice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting advice. Show all posts

TIPS ON HOW TO BECOME A RESPONSIBLE PARENT.




Hare Krishna.
All glories to Srila Prabhupada, Sri Guru and Gauranga.

So the topic is about how to become a RESPONSIBLE PARENT.

If we are a little observant then we can see that every living organism starting from a worm to an animal to bird to human, everyone gets a chance to become a parent. Worms, birds, animals all teach their offspring how to earn food. We humans call this earning livelihood. But this is just a bare necessity.

As a human, the definition of a responsible parent is a bit higher than the worm and animals. The thing which differentiates us from an animal is moral values and habits. 

Let us discuss few points which can be important for us

1. PARENT THEM BY AN EXAMPLE

yad yad ācarati śreṣṭhas
tat tad evetaro janaḥ
sa yat pramāṇaṁ kurute
lokas tad anuvartate


Whatever action a great man performs, common men follow. And whatever standards he sets by exemplary acts, all the world pursues.
Bhagavad Gita 3.21


This instruction of Krishna is extremely important for parents because they are the first role model for their children.

Hence we parents have to be an example for our kids.

Let us say if we are always engaged with TV, Smart Phone, Social Media, our child will definitely want to copy us. Now if we won't allow them, they will question us, "why can't we when you are doing the same." Even if they don't ask us verbally, they might have this in their mind. Our teachings fail when we cannot walk our talk.

Research shows that the reason why one watches TV or wastes time on Phone, Social Media, Cartoons, Movies is that they want to avoid getting bored. The reason why one gets bored is that they have time but no activities to engage themselves.

The best antidote to all the negative influences and addiction is to engage our children in some quality activities.

As a parent, we need to spend some quality time with them, play with them or recite some stories, stories which can help them build their strong character. Our Vedic Scriptures are full of such exemplary characters.  So instead of polluting their innocent mind with fiction characters like Captain America,  Spiderman,  Superman, we can introduce them to legends like Hanuman, Arjuna, Lord Ram, Lord Krishna etc.

We as parents should learn to control our emotions mainly in front of our children.

One of the main causes of shouting is bringing the tensions of the office into the house and showing the frustration on our partner and child.

If our children watch us shouting or yelling or disrespecting others, even they tend to follow it. This is again on a similar line to what we discussed earlier, we need to set a proper example for our children to follow. 

Another moral that we need to imbibe in our children by example is Art of Accepting our mistakes.

By apologizing for our standard doesn't fall. We should say sorry whenever we do anything wrong, not just to them but even to others, especially our spouses.

As a civilized person, we must teach them the culture of Thanking Others, Forgiving Others and Apologizing.



So we need to be cautious about the way our child is perceiving us.

We must try :

"NEVER EVER  LIE IN FRONT OF OUR KID"

"AVOID GADGETS INFRONT OF THEM"

"BE AT OUR BEST"


2. SHOW OUR AFFECTION :

Many times young parents get confused with the emotion of Affection.

We must understand that giving all comforts, giving all kinds of video games, new gadgets, and new toys are not "Affection".

Real affection is in giving them our quality time, speaking to them with words of love and touching them with love, giving them hugs and kisses, make them believe that we actually love them. This means a lot to them. They will not be feeling unsecured ever in their life.

This also helps in actually strengthening our bonds with them. This bond becomes the foundation of our relationships throughout our life.

Many times parents get overreacted and try to forcefully make their children do or no do something. Although it is important to make them obedient and disciplined we must be careful not to make them rebellious.

Today we can find parents becoming over lenient or over strict. Both extremes are harmful to the growing child.

It is important for us parents to go understand how to go strike a balance between the two extremes.

If we force our children to do or not to do something they might be frustrated and suffocated.

One way to deal with this situation is to reason with them.  For this, we need to get down to their intellect. This mantra works based on the bonding we have with our children.



Another aspect of showing affection is attentive listening.

Many parents do a mistake by not listening to their children. Children love to share their experiences,  day in school or day in the park, or their friend's activity, etc. This act of sharing their experiences deepens our bond, teaches them how to be expressive, teaches them the art of communication and most importantly makes them feel secure.



We must make it a point to ask our little ones about their day in school or playground.

3. DO NOT LET THEM GET ADDICTED:

viṣayā vinivartante
nirāhārasya dehinaḥ
rasa-varjaṁ raso 'py asya
paraṁ dṛṣṭvā nivartate

Though the embodied soul may be restricted from sense enjoyment, the taste for sense objects remains. But, ceasing such engagements by experiencing a higher taste, he is fixed in consciousness.
Bhagavad Gita 2.59


Many times we find ourselves struggling to give up something which we know is not good. Like smokers find it difficult to quit smoking, alcoholics find it difficult to quit alcohol, TV addicts find it difficult to quit TV, Krishna in Bhagavad Gita tells us a way to overcome this. He says paraṁ dṛṣṭvā nivartate which means the only solution is getting a higher taste.

For example, a person having once tasted the comfort of AC will never tend to opt for the fan in a summer afternoon. 

The child getting addicted to useless cartoons? Let us tell them stories with expressions so that their little imaginative brain can actually see our story with their eyes.

A child getting addicted to junk foods? Let us cook the best recipe and feed them with love and affection. 

We must give quality time to our children, ensure to have at least one meal together. 

The biggest mistake that young parents do is to have their peace, they tend to hand over mobile to their kids. We must never commit this mistake. 


4. GIVE THEM RESPONSIBILITY:

Children today are the future of tomorrow. If we want them to be responsible tomorrow we must train them from today. Our modern education system teaches them the responsibility of dominating and exploiting others so that one day they can be called leaders of the company/society and can earn bread.

But real responsibility is taking care of others by compassion and caring, this is not taught in the modern education system. We must teach this at our home.

Giving them responsibility means asking them to help mothers in household chores, serving water to elders, especially to father when he returns home after work, filling water bottles, giving medicines to grandparents, etc.


5. PUNISHMENT and ENCOURAGEMENT

No doubt punishment is extremely important for a growing child. Unless one is punished he will not understand the core teachings of life. However, at times, it is seen parents tend to get to extream. We must learn to strike a balance.

Punishment is counteracted by encouragement / praises.

Like in case of unforgivable offenses we might have to punish our child, we must also praise/ encourage when we see something good.

We must understand only punishment can lead to a mentally disturbed, cruel, insensitive and violent child.

Similarly, only praises can make a child proud, arrogant, self-centered.

Hence we must properly try to balance between the two sides.


BONUS TIP: RAISING LIKE A HUMAN.

āhāra-nidrā-bhaya-maithunaṁ ca
sāmānyam etat paśubhir narāṇām
dharmo hi teṣām adhiko viśeṣo
dharmeṇa hīnāḥ paśubhiḥ samānāḥ

Eating, sleeping, sex, and defense—these four principles are common to both human beings and animals. The distinction between human life and animal life is that a man can search after God but an animal cannot. That is the difference. Therefore a man without that urge for searching after God is no better than an animal.
The Mahabharata 


At the beginning of the article, we briefly touched upon the difference between animal and human, this verse from Mahabharata makes it clear.

We must engage our children in the service of the Lord. We must inculcate a culture of daily prayers and deity worship at our home, help them with devotee association, help them by discussing the scriptural injunctions.

This makes a child more humble and humane. He will grow up as a part of this society as an asset to this society and not like another parasite exploiting society.



Thank you very much
CHANT HARE KRISHNA AND BE HAPPY
   



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Top 10 Valuable And Powerful Tips For Every Parents



Hare Krishna.
All Glories To Srila Prabhupada.

The biggest problem in today’s scenario is inculcating good values in the minds of our young children. It is said that learning bad habits takes no time but to remain pious one have to really work hard. If we want to train or introduce Krishna Consciousness to our children, we should be very prompt in doing so.


Here I wanted to share a few things which I am following for the last 5 years and seeing results. I thought it may be useful to all young parents, especially mothers. 

Parenting Tip# 1. Garbadhan Samskara

To attract a pure soul into the womb, a couple must follow the "Garbadhan Samskara". When a couple plan for a child, they are advised to chant extra rounds of Hare Krishna Mahamantra. This makes their consciousness fixed on Krishna and hence helps in the process. In case one’s partner is not a devotee then at least he or she should follow the samskara.

Parenting Tip# 2. After successful conceiving

When a mother conceives, she should always try to be blissful and always hear the maha-mantra. She should try to read scriptures or pastimes like Krsna Book, Jagannath Past Times, Ramayana, etc.

When Hiranyakashipu's wife, Kayadu, was carrying Prahalad Maharaj in her womb, she was under the protection of Narada Muni. Every day Narada used to speak about the pastimes of Lord. One day she fell asleep but Prahalad Maharaj was replying to Narada Muni from the womb. There are many instances like this. So from here, we can learn one thing through scriptures is that a baby starts hearing from the womb itself, that is why a mother carrying a special soul must be extra careful.

Parenting Tip# 3. After baby’s first movement

When a mother feels the baby’s movement, parents should start speaking to the baby. As mentioned, a baby can hear everything and whatever a parent speaks affects a lot during pregnancy. 

I used to especially read Jagannath pastimes and Krsna book

One fine day when my daughter was about a year old, she started holding a pencil and writing something on the walls. When I looked closely, I saw, she was drawing Lord Jagannath's face. This can happen when we give a Krishna Conscious Environment to them. 


Parenting Tip# 4. Understand what giving Krishna Consciousness to Children mean

One very important point to be kept in mind is, giving Krishna Consciousness doesn’t mean we should force them to follow whatever we do. Rather parents should be the role models for them. Normally people think that small kids don't understand anything, but no, children can understand a great many things also if we try to explain to them by coming to their level.


Parenting Tip# 5. Restricting addiction to gadgets.

Most of the parents do this mistake. They keep candies or rasgulla in front of their children and tell them not to eat!!!

We must understand this. Many parents ask suggestion from me on how can they stop their children from the addiction of Gadgets and watching Cartoons. Generally, people think it is very tough to stop kids but I feel that this is very simple.  

If we have T.V.  at home, better don't recharge it and explain to your kid that T.V. is not working properly. Initially, they will not believe because these kids are very intelligent. You may then switch on the T.V. and show them. As a parent, we should also regulate our lifestyle in order to inculcate the values in our children. The problem comes when parents want to enjoy watching T.V. but expect their children to stay away from it.

When parents spend time with them, tell them stories from scriptures and play with them they will never touch mobile phones or look for artificial entertainment. Children feel the love through the touch so we should hug them, kiss them and play with them.

                                       

Parenting Tip# 6. Praising helps better than a material bribe

Generally it is seen that parents bribe their children with artificial material things, like allowing them to play video games, or watch youtube or mobile phone or watch T.V. Things might seem to work initially, but, on a long run it not only entangles the child in an addiction of gadgets but ruins their eyes also. 

There is a refined and better technique which I use on my daughter. If I want her to do something which she doesn’t want to do, I just start praising her, as soon as I praise her she does the thing. For example, if I want to feed her any vegetable which she doesn't like, I start praising her,  and soon she will finish her meal. This way of bribing is healthy, for it builds a bond between child and parents and also doesn’t spoil her health.

Parenting Tip# 7. Be a role model.

Parents must try to spend as much time as possible with their children as possible. This makes their children feel cared and loved. Thus slowly parent and child grow together to become best of friends. Children as they grow, they start admiring and considering parents as their role models.

Parenting Tip# 8. Do not feed them bad relation

As a young child, they learn many things from parents. Hence parents must be extra careful not to argue or quarrel in front of children. This affects them a lot, and they don't just start to disrespect parent but all relations in general.


Parenting Tip# 9. Gift them good value along with material education. 

There is a story of a mother and a son. The mother always wanted her son to be first in the class, go abroad and earn money. The boy did whatever his mother wanted him to do. He got settled abroad.

Once she got sick and was waiting for her son to come and take care of her, he didn’t come. One day she was sharing her sorrow with a wise man. 

The wise man asked her “did you ever take your son to temple?” She said “No.”
The man asked “did you take him to visit any relatives home”  She said “no”. 

Then the wise man said “when you didn't inculcate any good things in him, how you are expecting your son to come here and take care of you. All you have done is ask him to study, go abroad and earn money. You didn’t teach him to value relation. So he is doing whatever you wanted him to do, then why are you feeling bad now when he is not coming here and taking care of you?”

So from this story, we can learn a moral that yes we should ask them to study well, earn money and all the material things, but along with this, we should give them the culture, take them to temples, visit relatives, associate with devotees. Because if we give good values when they are small, they will never ever do any mistakes in their lives because of those values which we have inculcated in them.


Parenting Tip# 10. Have faith in Krishna. 

We must understand that everything in the life of a sincere devotee is orchestrated by the divine mercy of Krishna. Hence a devotee doesn't try to control things but to rely on Krishna's mercy. As a Krishna Conscious parent, one must humbly surrender to Krishna. This will also set an example for the children.

                                                       
I hope you have found these tips useful. If you have any suggestion, or confusion or need any parenting advise please leave a comment or contact us.



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Thank you for reading this article. 
If You have Liked it, then please share it with your friends and loved ones. Please feel free to suggest how can we further improve our service.

For more interesting articles please check - https://www.padaseva.in/p/sitemap.html 


Hare Krishna!

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